Sunday, October 29, 2006
Looking too far ahead...
As usual, I have completely sold myself to the idea of what I'm going to be doing next year, and instead of focusing on my one little exam that's tomorrow, and my summer subjects, I've been on e-bay buying books that I'll need for my Masters course and ... well... loss of motivation... *sigh*
I had a shit day today. Really. I woke up only to find that I'd received the worst grade ever for my political philosophy essay. I knew what I was saying was a bit radical, and I tend to write stuff that's a bit out there... but I've done that all throughout my degree. And generally, I have a pretty good idea of how well I do when I work. As a general rule, amount of effort at input = final mark. I put in effort. I'm not happy with getting a C for a philosophy subject when I KNOW what I'm doing, and I understand the concepts better than I've ever understood for any other course.
My lecturer and my tutor were great, no question about that - I really learned a lot. But I don't think I should be penalized for writing something that didn't fit the mould. I never have, and it's just not my style. So I spent today trying to appeal it and stressing over the mark, etc.
And strangely enough, I bumped into my tutor, who had seen my paper, and my mark... Oh, well... thanks for reassuring me a little bit :) He did very cautiously mention that the lecturer seems to be a little bit critical when he marks.
So... I come home thinking I should try to get my mind off this before I start to study for tomorrow's exam... and decided to watch "Osama" (BIG mistake). Great movie. No complaints. A beautiful film.
Just tragic, that's all. Absolutely tragic. Highly recommended. But now I'm somewhat depressed by the plight of women in Afghanistan and could hardly care less about a little linguistics exam tomorrow.
Other than that, I dropped in on the linguistics department again... Julie's marked one of my essays, finally, and it's being double marked by Heather again. I guess it means, once again, that I've either done really well, or really poorly, just like last time I had to be double marked. I guess I shouldn't worry too much about that.
Things just seem somewhat off today. I met up with Joel to study for linguistics, but I just couldn't concentrate (not after the Philosophy mark)... I went and got a coffee from HQ in campus centre, but they ran out of soy milk... then I went to the Den, and Wesley, who works there, and who I always chat with, didn't see me. I'd gone to see Juliet in MAI earlier, and she was telling me about the tense political situation in Fiji for an hour (I love to listen, but her nerves rubbed off on me). Another friend failed a maths exam. And the guy who went to ALI with me during the winter break still hasn't handed in the second essay for 6 credit points (I did 12 credit points - which is why I had more essays to write) and thinks he's going to fail the subject. Is this just a day for bad news or what?!
Is there good news today? Well... yes... Yoga was good. As always! I got next Thursday off work, so I can go to Catherine's birthday party. Marika from MAI thinks that they might be able to arrange for Khun Phasuk Phongphaichit (ผาสุก พงษ์ไพจิตร) (แม่, do you know her?) to supervise me during my masters. MAI is moving their office (hopefully) to Caulfield next year... I might not have any reason to go out to the 'jungle' campus any longer (dunno if that's good or bad news though).
More good news? I actually spent all of yesterday relaxing - for a change. It started with agreeing to make Alex lunch... he came over, had lunch... had a second lunch (cos I over-cooked, as usual), played some music, sung... then Aseem called, and I decided to feed him, too... and Dood came home, and well, like I said - we just relaxed! :) :) :)
And... My sister in law, Sally, just sent me some pictures of Sand and Sea - now THAT'S great news.... but I just miss everyone at home a lot... homesick :(
Should I quit my whining and do some study? I guess... *sigh*
ิBy the way, แม่, isä, I do miss you - I just never seem to be able to find an opportune moment to call :(
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