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De-Phazz
Astrud Gilberto
Lisa Ono
Madredeus
Antonio Carlos Jobim
The Knife
Silje Negaard
Paris Combo
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Pizzicato 5

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Who says we shouldn't watch old movies? After all my partying, working, generally doing stupid things around Helsinki, I finally got around to some proper relaxation and watched the film.

Listen to the theme - it's absolutely beautiful!



The movie was as beautiful as the theme song. Just in case you don't know, the director (Giuseppe Tornatore) is the same as the director of 'Malena', another stunningly beautiful movie.

That's my bit for today... if you really want to see picture of all the crazy crap I did over the weekend, here's this weekend:

http://monashedu.facebook.com/album.php?aid=16439&id=533997463

Also, I seem to have found myself from the following location:

http://www.summerheat.fi/galleries/sh070720/
fon @ 7:23 PM link to post * *


I guess it's about time I had a couple nights of restless sleep again. Again, a series of three dreams over two nights.

Dream 1, weather: sunny: I betray a loyal friend. I can't remember how right now, but the important part was the feeling of disgust at myself for having done the deed, and the deep feeling of powerlessness that came with the knowledge of being capability.

Dream 2, weather: cold & crisp: It's winter. A gang of about a dozen robbers come to our house and we fend them off. But in the end, we feel sorry for them and become their friends. Then I get stuck in this strange wooden elevator. I'm trying to go down, but I'm taken to some place called "Vuorijoki" where I am to participate in experiments concerning an endangered species of bear. [after I woke up, I discovered through google that yes, there is indeed such a place in Finland - but I have no idea about the endangered bears].

Dream 3, weather: gray and overcast: Sid excuses himself (perhaps to go to the bathroom) at a rather spooky train station, and I'm waiting for him for about an hour. But he doesn't come... and when he does, he's with two friends, having a great time, and I ask him why he couldn't have at least called. He pretends like nothing ever happened. I feel like he doesn't care anymore. I'm crying. Later on, we are sitting on this rooftop bar, and it starts raining everywhere else, but just not on this roof. He's doodling some shape that resembles a mouse on a piece of paper whilst I try to talk to him. So I grab his mouse drawing, and draw a speech bubble, writing inside it "I don't love you anymore." The mouse is meant to be him, and I'm inconsolable as he looks up sadly and says "it's true". It starts raining over us, too. I think I woke up in tears. But when I fell asleep, the dream continued. He wanted to keep being friends, but it was too difficult for me at the time, and I kept telling him not yet....

I'm awake now. What does all this mean?
fon @ 11:51 AM link to post * *




So here's me and some and random chick on the beach...

Aleksi's sets ("DJ Alex" - see below, on the right) really made my weekend... had a great time :) I did this quiz/test sort of thing where I had to assign people to colours, and on the basis of that... well, on my left is someone I'll never forget, and on my right, someone I'll always remember... I'm not sure if there's actually any difference between the two, but at least it's true! Hehe, gotta love the Arajarvi bros!

For more fun pics of the beach and the party, click here






So here's the Lappland look on me ... :P

I'm working there again next Wednesday (1st August)... bwahahaha!
fon @ 2:28 AM link to post * *


If you want to see something funny, come to Annankatu 20. So here's the update. When I was told to bring black shoes and stockings... well, ... guess what? I got to wear a traditional Lappish outfit!! I am SO going to take my camera to work tomorrow and take a picture. The place mostly caters to Japanese and Russian tourists... few brits (who ask for advice on where to go out from me, who hasn't been back to Finland for 4 years - I told them to walk up and down Eerikinkatu... ooops!).

The outfit got me thinking though... well... all the wait-staff were female. So what I asked a colleague was this: "Do they take any male employees? I mean, I can't really imagine many guys being happy with the Lappish dressing."

What was the answer? Well... The guys get to wear a t-shirt that says "Lappland" on it.

Hmm... it brings to mind what one lecturer had said about women's rights in SE Asia. E.g., Thai Airways. The women wear the traditional looking outfit, whilst the men wear the western suit. The role of the woman is to 'uphold tradition' whilst the men 'venture forth into the modern world'. Perhaps I should buy a pair of handcuffs along with me to work tomorrow and take a picture chained up to a stuffed reindeer or something (not that there is one at work or anything).

But is it necessarily so bleak? Ok, point taken, that when it comes to work uniforms, the female role is entirely constructed. But on the other hand, I really like the fact that I can keep in touch with my roots, AND stay in touch with my roots at the same time. For example, the NLCAC conference ball in 2005 and was comfortable both as a student leader and as a person proud of my roots. What so wrong with that? Could it not be said, in a counterargument to certain feminists, that women have that additional choice then?

And do I not have the right, and the opportunity to walk away from the job that I'm doing now? Yes. I do. Whilst that may seem simplistic, and one may argue that I may find it more difficult to get more jobs in the future... I also think that the more jobs I find unacceptable, the more trouble employees will have finding workers that will bend to their established rules and norms (even if it's only by a small percentage).

The point to all this is that every action we take, we are encouraging some sort of behaviour. I like my new work-uniform, so I'll wear it. It gives me the freedom to recognise my roots. But if someone were to force it upon me, perhaps I would not be so happy. And the only thing I'm unhappy about is that maybe it's the men who are restricted by having to hide their backgrounds in order to succeed in the world. They have to be scared of pink. They have to avoid bright colours. They have so many norms and rules to fit into... maybe we can view this as a global repression of men, as opposed to a culture-specific conformation of women. Just a question. What do you think?




This is a traditional Lappish outfit. Mine's the cheap version - to be seen tomorrow!
fon @ 5:32 AM link to post * *


Another nostalgic day behind me… and of course I forgot my camera at home… Not that there was anything specific to take a picture of… but well, for one, I saw an old friend of mine, Heikki, who hasn’t been doing quite as well as everyone else… he’s been in and out of hospital with schizophrenia. Emma had scared me into thinking that meeting him would somehow be really really traumatizing, so I went with Ilpo to see him, and left very little time for the meeting… at the end, however, I had a good time. I guess it really depends on peoples’ personal perceptions of things, how good or bad things are.

After that, went over to Niklas’ place and saw a whole lot of pictures from Malawi… highly nostalgic for me, since those are pretty much my childhood memories. And Cape Town, a bit of Kenya… My own childhood revisited. I guess once you’ve been to Africa, you’ll always have a bit of it in you…

Now I’m just waiting for the bus with an almost drained battery (will post once I’m home)… over a beer at ‘Rotterdam Bar’, where Heini and I had a few drinks on Tuesday. Kamppi is such a shock to me… It’s all new and different. But hey, things change.

I guess Niklas just has me feeling very very nostalgic. Over dinner at Mt Everest (a Nepalese place), I had a small theological discussion with him. And it seems that no matter how much lives change, and people develop, there’s always that little bit of your heart that will always recognise a person you once loved. So, for that reason, I walked off feeling so confused.

Sidhaesh: I know I rarely ever mention you in this blog… but I guess this is a good time. I know it must be difficult for you to read all of this. I mean, if I were in your shoes, it would be difficult for me. But the fact of the matter is just like what we talked about before I left – that no matter what, there’ll always be a special place for each other in our hearts. And I guess in this situation with Niklas, it works the same way. I hope you are not mad. I promised to tell you about everything.

Well, that was a fragment of my past though… and it makes me miss you even more. I hope that tells you something positive. And I hope you know – I mean really know that I love you.

But that’s that… on a lighter note: tomorrow I’m going to have a bit of work at some place on Annankatu (Anna’s Street), right in the centre… I was informed that all I have to bring are black shoes and stockings… the rest are provided… oh my god… what am I wearing at work??!

Some Australia pics I uploaded:

http://monashedu.facebook.com/album.php?aid=15275&l=c4703&id=533997463

http://monashedu.facebook.com/album.php?aid=15225&l=f25b9&id=533997463
fon @ 4:50 AM link to post * *




I was quite apprehensive about seeing Niklas today... I mean, who wouldn't? (for those of you who don't know, he was my 'first-love')

First of all, I wasn't meant to have seen him, but decided, when his brother, Aleksi, texted me that they were meeting, to jump in and surprise them. Mistake? I kinda feel like I should have just waited to have the time to properly catch up. Which we'll do tomorrow.

But yeah, I walked away feeling somewhat disappointed. Not shocked, as Aleksi thought I may have been, but rather just kinda flat. Like I was expecting something. Except I don't know what I would have been expecting.

Somehow, I think that's a positive thing though... perhaps I was psychologically preparing for fireworks or something again, like last time we saw each other after we'd broken up. So, I suppose, after all that mental self-defense in advance, my brain felt like it was dressed in chainmail, but had somehow misconstrued a lizard for a fierce dragon.

I was still really happy to see him though...

Apart from that, I went sailing with Sampsa and Jussi yesterday... then met Heini for drinks... then kept drinking... and drinking... until we were joined by some random dudes who Heini picked up at the bar, which was fun... then Aleksi came, and we kept drinking... so I was fairly wasted, lost track of the time, and ended up spending the night on Aleksi's sofa... but yeah... we had lots to talk about, so I'm glad to have gone for a visit... and besides, I think maybe Otto (the tortoise) remembered me ;P

I saw Ilpo again briefly and gave him my Pizzicato 5 vinyl (which I had mistaken for a CD on e-bay)... he still like P5 music, so it's good to have it in the hands of someone who will use it!

But yeah... Niklas. How odd it was seeing him. How very quaint indeed... it really makes me miss my Daeshy a lot, though... I felt strangely lonely after I left for home - and somehow I just really really wanted to see him (Sidhaesh)... and can't believe that there's still almost 5 months to go.

Perhaps all this has cleared my mind of a few clouds I may have been nurturing.
fon @ 12:36 AM link to post * *


How is this possible? I'm baffled...




A self-portrait a la manga

It's strangely addictive... if you suddenly feel as though you may have time to procrastinate (or not!) try this out! (yes, I know it's lame... I'm sorry for revealing my lameness to the world) I'll try to remain more cynical in the future so as to not offend anyone...
fon @ 4:34 AM link to post * *


So... Hki.

Deerhoof. Emma. Mirrormask. Kiasma. Swimming. In no particular order.

Deerhoof gig was good... liked the singer a lot, but found the rest of the bad a bit mediocre... the amazing part was just finding a gig on a Tuesday night.

Next day we went swimming. Well, if you count 4 laps swimming... otherwise, it may be more accurate to say we went sauna-ing. Kiasma was shit this time round, unfortunately, but I met Miika for dinner and a beer and then went home (ie, Emma's place) to see Mirrormask (a movie with a screenplay by Neil Gaiman - good stuff, highly recommended for the Neil Gaiman lovers out there!)

So... Yesterday, ... Sampsa, Nora, Pia, Maria, Steve

Pia, Maria and Steve I met for the first time... but we had a few apple ciders at Nora's place and ended up having a somewhat confused discussion on aboriginal rights. Especially Steve, Nora, and me. I must admit, perhaps three o'clock in the morning, under the influence isn't the greatest situation to be discussing politics in. Although it is certainly fun!

I still had the sense to remember that my results were coming out today.... *ah* satisfying.

I got a HD in all my subjects this semester... First time that's happened! Awesome!

So tonight, Heini had to cancel, so it seems that I will be going to 'ahjo chillounge' with Ilpo instead... Should be interesting... probably will be a few people there that I will barely remember, but, well... we'll see...

Hmm.... I'm sure it'll be fine... who could it possibly harm? (famous last words?)
fon @ 2:49 PM link to post * *


It's hard to believe that as of now, I've been gone just 45 minutes less than a week. It feels like much more time than that has passed. After all, I've been through Thailand, got a new computer, seen my grandfather, bothers, nieces and nephews, arrived in Finland, attended a funeral, attended a Finnish church service for the first time in my life, taken care of NOHA and DIAC paperwork, placed an ad for a housemate (for Kelvin), picked blueberries, met with Emma, gone to a deerhoof gig, gone swimming, gone to Kiasma, met Miika, said good-bye to Emma (until the end of the month).

And now I am sitting alone in Emma's apartment, doing nothing. Sipping a coffee quietly, enjoying the first real moments of solitute. It's strangely fitting that my first moments of 'aloneness' are at Emma's house. Until I pick up my phone and call anyone, there are no plans for the day. And until I open my mouth, there is no sound to betray me but the light tap-tap-tapping of the keyboard.

So, rewind. My grandfather's funeral was on 07/07/07, as if arranged, but in reality, not so. It was even going to be on the 14th, but some people couldn't make it. It's like Vaari (that's grandfather in Finnish) arranged it from across the line and also made sure that his granddaughter managed to get her ticket changed to the very last available flight out of Australia.

And I'm glad I was there. How wonderful it is to see a lot of the family there, and for the most part, simply supporting one another.

On Sunday we accompanied my grandmother to church. My grandmother turned to ask me - "Now, surely you go to church when you are overseas?" and not wishing to lie, I said, "Well, I go to temples...", to which she replied "Ah! Why, those things! Good, good - that's what I thought", as if I'd confirmed her suspicions that there must be no proper churches out of Europe. Wanting to be a good sport, I asked my dad, sitting on the other side of my grandmother, "Can I light a candle?"... "No! Nothing needs to be done here!" Being the persistent kid, however, I asked my grandmother, too. She shooed me off to light a candle, much to the amusement of quite a few in the little church. Well, at least my grandmother was happy.

I guess the rest of the update can come a little later... Helsinki feels like a whole new world to me, and perhaps merits a whole new post...
fon @ 12:14 PM link to post * *


Got my new laptop, finally... and there is something to be said for MAC... The economist wondered, a few issues ago, what it was about MAC that inspired almost religious dedication from users... I'm wondering what it is about my computer that can't run Picasa (unless I use bootcamp) that is making my feel like I should cover every inch of it with protection (which is what I've already done, probably adding another half kg to the weight!).

Dunno... but perhaps there's something to a name... when I was a kid, I loved going to McDonalds... now, I'm a dedicated MAC cosmetics user, and now to become a MAC computer user. There's must be something about MAC?

Well, anyhow, the fact that I have time to blog right now means that for some reason I am up well before my alarm clock rang, despite having less than four hours sleep (never mind, the plane is a good place to catch up). Well, it's not some reason. It's that I should have slept on my brother's floor. The room I'm sleeping in has these thin bamboo blinds that not only don't block out the sunlight, but also are completely see-through (re: I can't get changed in the room at night - I have to stay in the bathroom or risk becoming an unwitting porn-star). This well-lighted situation at 6-ish in the morning means that I wake up thinking it's past 8 and I've missed my ride with my brother. It also means that, before going back to sleep, Alba (my dog) spends five minutes licking my blanket somewhere around the area where my knee is located.

And now she's snoring. Loud. Bitch! (well, it's a she)

Hmmm... this time my oldest brother doesn't have a new car (well, it's only been half a year), but there's a new terrier in the house, instead, which Indy (who I haven't seen yet) has named "A-Kiu". A-Kiu does not mean anything in Thai, and I'm almost certain some Japanese or Chinese ghost must have possessed my nephew when that happened... anyone with a good knowledge of either language or in possession of a good dictionary?

My hands are covered in scratches, too, so I can only assume that the evil spirit has transferred itself into A-Kiu (who has very sharp nails), so we may be looking at the angry ghost of some deceased samurai, ninja, or emperor's concubine.

Aaaah...the mysteries...

My trip to Thailand was Murphy's delight. Everything that could go wrong at the airport, did go wrong. So Sid's idea was to not mention that I've got a carry-on bag and just check in my 26.6 kg suitcase. Fine, no probs there. The check-in lady was even Finnish and struck up a conversation with me!

But the moment I walked through the door leading to customs, this short, fat, sour-looking man points me to a scale and well... surprise surprise, 8 kilos over carry-on allowance! So he sends me back... and this cute wog guard who I passed earlier smiles sweetly and tries to negotiate on my behalf with the fat prick, but to no avail.

Back at check-in, the lady (not the Finnish one this time, but French) gives me a good scolding for not having mentioned my carry-on. Then is about to charge me for the eccess... and is generally sour... but then, change of tack... Suddenly she smiles, whispers that I don't have to pay anything - her supervisor just left! Awesome!!! But then inside, my passport is too new for old Australian equipment at customs and I end up having to wait half an hour with all the deportees while they scan my passport with the one, single new machine.

I get paged for my flight.

On the Thai side, the customs saw my two bottles of wine in the scan and decided they wanted to see it. So after I'd unpacked half my suitcase and couldn't find them, they changed their mind and decided to trust that I wasn't carrying illegal substances after all. Thank-god they didn't ask to see my books. I'd still be sitting at the censorship bureau or something.

Time for a shower...

Daeshious, I MISS YOU!!!! Don't have a mobile here, so might not be able to call you until I get to Finland!
fon @ 6:50 AM link to post * *


Couldn't he just wake up one day and be happy to see me, instead of grumbling, turning over and going back to sleep?
fon @ 5:48 AM link to post * *


I'll be sending some photos to you all personally, because not all of them are online... but here's some starters :)

http://monashedu.facebook.com/album.php?aid=13002&l=6389d&id=533997463
fon @ 2:15 PM link to post * *